No Crying in the Boardroom!

I have always been a big crier.  I know Donald Trump frowns upon crying in the boardroom but I shed a LOT of tears during my time in Corporate America.  I tried SO hard to excel in the career I was “supposed” to have.  I was passionate, I was driven, and wanted to conquer the world.  I had vision and ideas, and I knew just how to pull it all off.  I discovered, however, these are not qualities that are looked upon with enthusiasm in Cubicle Land.

I hated it every time.  I could feel them coming, that little tickle in my nose, spreading through my cheeks, working its’ way up to my eyes while I’m trying my hardest to hold it in. Dang it, waterworks, again!  And once the floodgates were open, there was no stopping.  Nothing a boss, especially a male boss, likes worse that a crier.

Strangely, the day I was fired, there weren’t many tears.  I sat patiently dried eyed through the firing spiel.  I didn’t make any comments or ask any questions.  I know they were expecting a downpour.  Surprisingly, the tears didn’t come!

It wasn’t that I didn’t feel shocked, upset or freaked out, because, believe me, I was.  It was different.  I realize now, this was the moment I knew there was no going back.  I had finally reached my breaking point.  I was jumping off the corporate treadmill .  For good.  This has been the only thing powerful enough to block my tear ducts up!

Of course, there were tears later.  And I have spent a LOT of time crying this year. But, they are different tears.  They are not tears about the life I was “supposed” to have.  They are my tears.

I started my life over that day.  I was granted a Second Chance.  And my tears have never been the same.